I Wish I Could Take Credit For Some Of These...

1.  Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

2.  America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote.

3.  A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

4.  My favorite mythical creature? The honest politician.

5.  Brotherly love is like communism; everyone gets a share, but it only works in theory.

6.  Don't steal. That's the government's job.

7.  Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

8.  A liberal is just a conservative that hasn't been mugged yet.

9.  Said the corporate CEO:  Why don't you remove those barriers to imports? It will ease my inflation and the benefits will trickle down.

10. Republicans & Democrats are like divorced parents who care more about getting the kids to hate the other one than they are their well-being.